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The Roman Empire was one of the largest and most famous reigns in history. Its influence still ripples in the modern world. It was full of great leaders, each with a unique, strange side. From the youngest, most drunken with power to the seemingly generous – so much as to make their horse senator – the kingdom had all the characters. Here’s more to make you pity or laugh, even though their subjects probably didn’t giggle much.
Caligula (37-41 A.D.)
You might have come across this name already. Caligula’s real name was Gaius Julius Ceaser, although he also went by the nickname “Little Boots.” He came in right after Emperor Tiberius’s death, who also happens to be his second cousin and another megalomaniac. Although the Romans first saw Caligula as a generous, fresh face, they soon realized he was no better than Tiberius.
Caligula would murder anyone who disagreed with him on the slightest matters. He used his cousin’s strategy of treason trials to get rid of his enemies. He also engaged in unconventional sexual behavior that angered his subjects. For one, he is suspected of indulging in incest with his sister, Julia Drusilla.
One of the funniest stories told about Little Boots, as historians Suetonius and Dio would have us believe, is that he made his horse, Incitatus, senator. However, this rumor remains debatable. Other historians think he only threatened to do it but never went through. It was simply a stunt to insult and humiliate the senate – sort of like saying even a horse can do their job.
Caligula was assassinated in 41 A.D. by the Praetorian Guard and probably never got to make his horse senator. But it wasn’t all for nothing. At least Incitatus was left with a marble stable and popularity to rival Caligula’s senators to date.
Nero (54-68 A.D.)
Emperor Nero was one of the most hated in Rome. According to accounts by historians such as Suetonius, Tacitus, and Cassius, Nero is believed to have distrusted most people close to him. He had his first wife killed and later kicked his second wife to death.
It gets better – he went on to marry a young boy who looked like his second dead wife, castrated him, and forced him to dress as a woman. Nero ordered the killing of his mother in the hands of a loyal ex-slave as well.
But he wasn’t an all-work and no-play guy. Nero loved to gamble. He’s not alone in this one, though. Other emperors such as Claudius and Augustus kept their dice close, too. However, Nero was the only one crazy enough to bet 400,000 sesterces on a single throw (enough to buy the middle-class status in Rome back then). He would have loved online casinos today, with the Roman Empire being the inspiration behind many modern slot machines.
The emperor also fancied playing the lyre and singing, which is probably what he was doing as Rome burnt under his rule in 64 A.D. After all, he was quick to build his palatial garden – the Domus Aurea – on the cleared land. His citizens were taxed heavily for it. In the meantime, the Christians were taking the blame and getting executed. Rumors have it the poor souls were “oiled” and set ablaze to illuminate the Domus Aurea at night.
Domitian (81-96 A.D.)
Also mentioned in the Bible, Domitian was the last ruler of the Flavian dynasty and a tyrant king. His father, Vespasian, was a general who had risen from the chaos that followed Nero’s fall. He had restored some sort of stability, which may be why the Romans accepted Domitian in the first place.
Yet Domitian had none of his father’s qualities. He was characterized by a deep suspicion that sparked a reign of blood and executions. He had anyone suspected of conspiracy against him executed, including two of his cousins, 12 ex-consuls, and the head vestal virgin, who he had buried alive.
According to Caesarea, the historian who wrote Domitian’s story 300 years later, his rule was marked by the onset of large-scale persecution of Jews and Christians. As expected, he met his end through blood. Domitian was unexpectedly stabbed by a palace servant, although historians think his wife, Domitia, expected it very much.
Commodus (180-192 AD)
Commodus was son to Marcus Aurelius, but far from the great leader his father was. The lazy megalomaniac loved wine, sexual escapades, spending, and gladiatorial sports. He would sometimes participate, taking on criminals and slaves. He also loved to kill animals in the Roman amphitheater for pleasure.
Commodus is also thought to have declared himself a living god and forced his subjects to worship him. He went so far as to replace statues with his image and name several months of the year after himself.
His spending eventually bankrupted the Roman treasury. His idea of refilling it was executing wealthy citizens and confiscating their property. As with other tyrants, people started plotting against him and lost their heads (literally), including his sister – Lucilla.
Eventually, the Praetorian Guard and his court chamberlain got him by hiring someone to strangle him in the bath. That was the end of Commodus’s depraved story, which can hardly be covered in a few paragraphs.
Elagabalus (218-222 AD)
Some might say Elagabalus was also the strangest of Rome’s Emperors. He came to Rome from Syria and ascended to power when he was about 14 years old. He brought with him the Syrian god Elagabalus, which is where he got his nickname.
He was so fond of his Syrian god that he would make animal sacrifices every morning and had him replace the traditional Roman god Jupiter. It is also rumored he tortured and sacrificed children to his god.
Much like other Emperors on this list, Elagabalus loved sexual proclivities as well. He took five wives within his four-year reign, including a vestal virgin and a male slave. He is also said to have prostituted himself in taverns and was a cheat. He would pay agents to sleep with him and brag to the other prostitutes about bringing in more money.
Elagabalus was in search of a physician that could castrate him and give him female organs. Meanwhile, he plucked his body hair and dressed like a lady, even asking his male athlete lover, Zoticus, not to refer to him as “my lord” for he was a lady. Too bad for him; there was no sex reassignment surgery back then.
Conclusion
It would seem the roman emperors on this list loved their drink, blood, and gods, much like they did their women and men alike. However, most of these accounts were given centuries after the emperors were out of power. It is only safe to say that there’s always some truth behind every rumor.
Featured Image Credit: Photo by Federico Scarionati on Unsplash