{"id":31292,"date":"2019-06-04T16:54:20","date_gmt":"2019-06-04T21:54:20","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/urbanmatter.com\/chicago\/?p=31292"},"modified":"2019-10-08T13:09:30","modified_gmt":"2019-10-08T18:09:30","slug":"whatever-dont-finish-last-chicago-malort-5k","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/urbanmatter.com\/chicago\/whatever-dont-finish-last-chicago-malort-5k\/","title":{"rendered":"Whatever You Do, Don\u2019t Finish Last at the Mal\u00f6rt Chicago 5K"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">For some reason, we just keep coming back to this <\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Mal\u00f6rt<\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> shit.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Is it brewed in the fires of hell? Is it death in liquid form? Nobody knows, but somehow, it\u2019s been an instant success in its hometown of Chicago, even though <a href=\"https:\/\/urbanmatter.com\/chicago\/malort-reactions\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">we all agree that it\u2019s terrible.<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The only ingredient that adds flavor to Jeppson&#8217;s <\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Mal\u00f6rt<\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> is wormwood, which makes me skeptical that this isn\u2019t actually a Harry Potter potion that we\u2019ve all been tricked into drinking by wizards disguised as bartenders. I mean, wormwood is used to brew the Draught of Living Death, so I don\u2019t think we\u2019re very far off here. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">All besides the point. You too can take a shot of this disgustingly beautiful liquor at the Mal\u00f6rt Chicago 5K on Saturday, July 27. Following the 20th anniversary of the Chicago Fire Soccer Club, they\u2019ll be hosting this the Chicago Mal\u00f6rt 5K at the CIBC Fire Pitch and Heineken Pub97 to support the Chicago Fire October 8th Committee and the Fire for Food drive, which benefits the Chicago Food Depository. <\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">For just $40, you\u2019ll receive a shot of <\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Mal\u00f6rt at the start and end of the Mal\u00f6rt Chicago 5K race. You&#8217;ll also receive <\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">a dope T-shirt and 10-percent off your Pub97 tab. Yes, you have to take the shots if you\u2019re going to participate. Especially the first one.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">And, if you finish the Mal\u00f6rt Chicago 5K in first place,\u00a0<\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">you\u2019ll get to take home a bottle of this stuff that would be in your best interest to pour down the drain. However, the loser\u2019s prize is even better: <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">two<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> of your very own gag-inducing bottles of Mal\u00f6rt. That\u2019s the best incentive there is if you ask me.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">To find more information and to sign up for the Mal\u00f6rt Chicago 5K (bless your soul), buy your <a href=\"https:\/\/section8.ticketleap.com\/malort-5k-2019\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">tickets<\/a><\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. If you&#8217;re curious about the devil&#8217;s drink, you can check with <a href=\"http:\/\/www.jeppsonsmalort.com\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Jeppson&#8217;s<\/a>.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><em><strong>Featured Image Credit: <a href=\"https:\/\/www.insidehook.com\/chicago\/malort-chicago-cocktail-summit\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Inside Hook<\/a><\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n<h3 style=\"text-align: center;\">Find what really matters in Chicago with the UrbanMatter app!<\/h3>\n<h3 style=\"text-align: center;\">To download or see reviews from our users, head\u00a0<span style=\"color: #00ccff;\"><a style=\"color: #00ccff;\" href=\"https:\/\/urbanmatter.com\/app\/\">here<\/a><\/span>.<\/h3>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>For some reason, we just keep coming back to this Mal\u00f6rt shit. Is it brewed in the fires of hell? Is it death in liquid form? Nobody knows,&hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2279,"featured_media":31294,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[755],"tags":[5677,5673,1005,5676,5672,5668,5675,5674,3740,4600,5669,5670,5671],"class_list":["post-31292","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-category-things-to-do","tag-buckledown-brewery","tag-chicago-5k","tag-chicago-fire","tag-chicago-fire-soccer-club","tag-chicago-malort","tag-chicago-malort-5k","tag-chicago-races","tag-chicago-runs","tag-jeppsons-malort","tag-malort","tag-malort-shots","tag-why-is-malort-so-bad","tag-why-is-malort-so-popular"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v21.4 (Yoast SEO v26.8) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-premium-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Whatever You Do, Don\u2019t Finish Last at the Mal\u00f6rt Chicago 5K | 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